We're in Harare now, at the TEAM guest house. The internet is working well, a lot faster than out in the bush. Dr. Todd, our program director, as well as our friends Dr. Leu and his son in law, Craig came to visit us on Tuesday. It was absolutely wonderful seeing them, and they brought us some goodies from home. The guys rounded with us during the week and shared their wonderful insights into the patients on the wards, in outpatient department, and in surgery. Heck, Dr. Todd even scrubbed a couple of C sections!
We were on call last weekend. Aside from the usual rounding in all of the wards and seeing some out patients on Saturday (who are usually sick enough to become inpatients, or they wouldn't be there on a Saturday) the weekend was uneventful. That is until Sunday night. We received a call around 8 PM for a mother who'd been in labor for a while. The story was typical. She had labored at home, then gone on to a rural health clinic, then gone to a local hospital, and finally arrived in our maternity ward around 5 PM or so. We came as quickly as we could and began our Cesarean Section in the standard manner.
It became quickly evident that the baby's head was stuck deep in the mother's pelvis, as she had labored for many hours. As we entered the uterus, we became acutely aware that infection had set in already in the fluid surrounding the baby, which was thick green, and smelled badly. Our patients were clearly in danger. I prayed aloud as we struggled for what seemed to be forever (but was in reality only a couple of minutes) to get the baby out. Finally, we pulled the limp, blue little boy from his mother. As the nurses worked on helping the little one, we were faced with the task of working on the woman, whose uterus lay as soft and limp as her child, bleeding profusely. After much work, we finally repaired the extensive bleeding tear in the uterus, my salty surgical mask now sticking to my face. Still, the woman's blood pressure was barely registering on our monitors. The quiet in the room was disturbing as the nurse pumped air into the little one's chest, interrupted only but the alarm from the blood pressure machine, a sobering reminder of the blood loss we had just worked so hard to stop.
After stabilizing the mother, we put all of our energy into the little boy, laying lifeless on the newborn warmer. We pumped up and down on his little chest, breathed for him, and gave all the drugs we could to jump start his little heart. Despite our greatest efforts, we could not bring him back. There in the dim light of the maternity ward, soaked in my own sweat, I wanted to weep.
I thought we'd lose the mother too. My heart aches for her, but she gets to live another day.
I thought we'd lose the mother too. My heart aches for her, but she gets to live another day.
And so goes life here. It seems to be a raw, primal sort of fight for survival. The woman in the story above has nothing. I am sure she lives in a hut in a patch of corn without running water or electricity. She eeks out her existence any way she can, spending her days carrying water buckets on her head long distances so that her family can drink and tending fires to cook the little food she has.
I don't want to put words in God's mouth or go outside of the scriptures for my beliefs just because I want something to be true. But, I trust in the character, mercy, and sovereignty of God. In doing so, I was thinking about that little one's short time in this cruel world. In the arms of Jesus, he will never know the pain of hunger, the depths of loss, or humiliation of poverty that his mother has known for decades and now will know for many more. It's hard to make sense of this world, especially when confronted with the hard reality of it on a daily basis.
Stories like this beg the question, "How can suffering like this exist if there is a God?" or "If there is a good God, why does such injustice exist?" These are good questions, and those who face suffering in life are bound to wonder about them. I was encou
raged today in reading a book called "The Reason for God," by Tim Keller. He points out the firstly, in the assumption that things in the world are broken or unjust, one naturally assumes that there is a certain way that things ought to be, that is we assume that things in the world shouldn't be broken. Without God, as the absolute standard for good and justice, we have no reason to assume that things should be going any sort of right way (and they obviously are not in many respects). A world without God, organized only by the survival of the fittest, leaves us no such standard by which to judge things. Therefore, without God, thinking that the world should be a just or fair place is simply nonsense. Suffering is therefore not a good argument against the existence of God
raged today in reading a book called "The Reason for God," by Tim Keller. He points out the firstly, in the assumption that things in the world are broken or unjust, one naturally assumes that there is a certain way that things ought to be, that is we assume that things in the world shouldn't be broken. Without God, as the absolute standard for good and justice, we have no reason to assume that things should be going any sort of right way (and they obviously are not in many respects). A world without God, organized only by the survival of the fittest, leaves us no such standard by which to judge things. Therefore, without God, thinking that the world should be a just or fair place is simply nonsense. Suffering is therefore not a good argument against the existence of GodSecondly, Christianity alone among world religions believes that God took on human flesh to come and be with us (Immanuel = "God with us"). Christ, when he died on the cross experienced separation from the God head (that is, the Father and the Holy Spirit). People know the deep pain of loss of intimate relationships in divorce or the loss of a loved one. We can relate to this pain of separation on that level, but we cannot fathom the pain of separation of the Son of God from the Father, with whom he had lived in perfect harmony for eternity. Jesus provides people a Savior who can sympathize with loss, imprisonment, fear, abandonment, injustice, and death. Christianity may not provide a concrete answer for the specific suffering, but Christ does provide a very real source of strength for those who suffer. Jesus talks about the future "New Heaven and New Earth" and the "Renewal of all things," or what the Greeks knew as"παλιγγενεσια" or "palingenesia." The Greeks understood this word to mean the re-creation of the universe. Jesus promises in a way that we cannot imagine to some day make all of those things right, or even better than right in a very concrete way.
Suffering is therefore also a very poor argument for a detached, impersonal, or uncaring God.
On a happy note, I figured out how to make ice cream. It consists of 3 liters of milk, 2 packets of pudding, a can of sweetened condensed milk, and some vanilla extract. Put it in the deep freeze overnight (if you have power) and presto! Tastes just like a Frosty. Not too shabby when the closest Wendys is a few thousand miles away.
Here are some cute pics to offset the sad story at the beginning of the post:
